WTF I TYPED A WHOLE LONG SHIT! NOW ALL GONE! FUCK!!!

first and foremost i'm really struggling to stay awake , i NEED to watch my "the seventh day" tvb drama, ok i know i watched it before but i'm still mad about it.

can't believe im gonna say bye to 2009 tmr, i think the age thing is killing me i swear. anyhows 2009 has been a great year, to me at least. i finally graduated from NYP even after failing and being a full-time floater for 2 years? NYP has been great, i made some close friends like em, sl, hl, tb though i never thought i would. i was a floater after the first sem, naturally i was drifted away from everyone. lucky enough i was back on track in year 3, things got a bit better but what matters is the friendship after poly. although its just a handful of them, i'm already contented.

what about relationship? ups and downs, AND again ups and downs. i've been in and out of many different relationships, but i guess the one that cause the greatest impact would have to be ben and charlie (i think this would be interesting). ben and i had a really rough one together, it was either me or him. well, if i were to say out everything sure lack of sleep. what's the conclusion is i will NEVER EVER like him or get back with him. so i'm actually hoping that everyone would not go around assuming that we're back to square 1 and of course stop being paranoid. it's such a 1990s thing.
as for charlie, i always grin to myself whenever i think about the process of us getting to know each other. i still remember how i was afraid you would be like all the failed lovers i had in the past, and always preventing the wrong moves. after a good whole 2 months, (ok la not say very good, but still passable) you've really been a great boyf to me. mega spoil me every single time, which is not good, as i get pissed whenever i don't get things the way i want it to be. like recently. but you always know how to make it better, by appearing at my window at 7am?, dumping your friends for me, just making it better. like today(31 dec), we went blading and i had a great fall,

my days aint getting better, how funny.

it's weird how i'm saying this but i'm tired! i'm very tired over eveything. every single thing that has been happening. it feels like the past suddenly.

omg i want C to be here now.

dom's bday mins back, i actually like the feeling now, not too high not too soble.
kay i really cannot wait for C to be back.
night!

how can we be sure that the other half knows that we love them? has the 3 words been said too often, that it doesn't feel as special as it felt the first time we said it? has expectation changed, we just want more don't we? have we been too comfortable to an extend that we forgot to show our love a little more?
well, i am definitely sure about my love. there's not a day where i stop loving or love a little lesser.
days back i was afraid that history would repeat, but i was convinced. convinced that it just my imagination. right now i guess i could be right all along.

6:30am i'm utterly exhuasted.

Helloo everyone, xmas is gone and 2010 is coming. I had a warm xmas this year, as uausal dinner with jems - m + c + v!, small gathering at hanleng's, countdown at alvans and family dinner. Skipped fullerton's cause it was a little out of place. Anyways that not the point, my stupid fat rice(opppss)is in KL right now, and we haven't met since like what? Xmas! Bad enough! Slut you better buy back some shit for me.
I really drag 2010, cause I'll be turning 22? Wtf! Such a huge number man. Its like a number to remind me the end of my youth, which means I can't go forever 21, wah nb better go before I turn 22 man. And and and 2009 has been a long eventful year, as least to me. I graduated, I worked, many other things la! I'll name it on the next post. Ok, I nearly got a heart attack, I'm over at hillside "watching" a soccer match, guys super synchronise man! Soccer make them look like fools. So, I just wish, wish only that 2010 never comes.
Tmr's new years lunch with jemsc, and dom's bday.damn wtf! Cause I thought everything was today! Like how I though lunch was today and I was a little happy, asked stupid charlie along, it was super stupid la! We still went to vivo bought food and realised it was for tmr! So what!? Me and C went all the way to vivo to buy pork belly?, and AGAIN bistro 103 was close, C got summon. Seee!! Nor your fault la! Wtf!
Okay, I'm bored of typing, I shall TRY to enjoy this soccer match.

HAHAHA i was swooning over all those cute puppy pictures and maybe i change my mind abit, hahahaha! im still a chihuahuha fan! few days back i told C that i want all pugs! BUT pugs QUITE scary looking lor! i dont mind having 1, but not 10. kay i was just day dreaming how my future house could fit my 10 dogs. HAHAHA! but i think 9 chihuahua and 1 pug will do. PUI HOON dont be bias! chihuahua is cute right! better den pebbles lor!

it's not really easy to find a cute pug image.

charlie goh give you a picture to go happy.

another good whole week and i can't believe just a blink and xmas is coming. i don't have the xmas vibes like how others do, i guess its just 21 years of xmas, afterall it's just another xmas. good thing is, i thought i would never have another family xmas dindin after last year's no xmas dinner. Thank god! i super thick skin i went to ask my uncle for xmas dinner! and he say GOT GOT! ask me what type of food i want! now i feel the family!



back too my good week, friday was JB with sm and em! i'm amazed how fun JB could actually be, usually it's just the normal dinning and walking ard. this trip different man! cause i went BERSAK! i buy buy buy buy! though i dont have much la! but i everything also wanna buy! i even have the thoughts of swiping my card, and now i regret i didn't, cause sg doesnt have the dress that i wanted from MNG. plus their rayban all super madness, 40%, no wonder my stupid bf cannot resist and bought his for 50%! WTF! i wanna go back JB!.


i had mad shopping with pris and bought nothing much! i havent worn any of my new clothes, bad habits bad habits! buy buy buy never wear!. charlie took mc for 2 days, and i made full use of it. sunset grill like finally but level 2 was such a spoiler! i remember the other time with mainy and ling even with level 2 i was weeping like baby! this time finger licking good also can.


today was super eventful, bought ham which broke my fridge layering thing, caught sniper over at charlie's -_-" not very nice, over to bt batok and FINALLY that stupid charlie's data plan is
working! bbm bbm! and and to ah ma house for tang yuan! and i got MANY kinder buenos!!!!!!

kay i manage to dig a few pictures because i was playing bbm with charlie sending him pictures and all! super boring blog! no pris no pictures!

super love this week, holidays are here, i had a ppf suntanning session, my love is back, so telll me how not to love this week besides the part where i acted overly senstitive? ARGH heck! everything's fine.

suntanning was fun! i'm front burnt and back completely white! YEAP! awesome catching up with miss slut and her nonsense whose slippers got chopped off. WHATEVER! SLUT, K FINE! BITCH! MAKE A NEW DATE TO TAN OUR FREAKING BACK! and stop caling me to tell me lame stuff that will make me roll my eyes?

guess what i got from love! Krispy Kreme =) awesome! i just cant get enough of it.

and and!my MBMJ wallet! FINALLY! pretty amazed. he anyhow buy also can buy the one i wanted. super loved.

hurray i'm working tmr, and friday i'm going JB. everything is prefectly cool.

guess who's coming back in 17 hours time =))))

WTF WTF WTF! can you guys feel my agony? wtf! i'm fucking willing to fucking re-do and do the fucking group projects but all those idiots only know how to bomb my freaking phone and WHAT NOW! finally home decided to burn every single brain cells BUT I DONT HAVE MY FUCKING SOURCE! WTF FUCK AH!!

am i ageing already?everything feels a little out of place. to be exact i'm talking about friends. like how i rather be home after school den having my usual hang out. wtf! 3 hours before school and i'm thinking about such stuff. gosh. anyhows, i don't get how someone can have such constant false thinking about themselves just so they could feel better. well, if you think that i'm not any different at least i don't go saying how pretty i am, oopps. too much to say!

this is mf-ing cute! the colours, the kids, everyday!

anyhows, 1 paper down 3 more to go!!

i think love makes me fat. and KYQ agrees to that too.

d-----------@gmail.com says:
haha yaa at the start will grow fat!!!

1 word to describle this week awesome. the rate charlie treats me, i'm totally gonna be spoilt. i feel blissed? but at the same time i just don't want to?. how many bad love have you gone thru? how many morning heartaches have you had? then again, it's beyond my control. just today alone i got to see him 4 time, 1 in the morning before kendo?, 2 to deliver lunch, 3 after gym, and 4 for dinner. though it's madness school period, i don't feel any pressure at all, at least not for now. tmr's assignment more or less there already. and i mistook, KYQ is coming back on the 29th DEC! fucking long i know, and we're having HTHT which i totally remembered we havent been doing for damn long!! we use to email each other with damn hell lot of complains but gradually we stopped. and today we're doing it again, and it feels great. 12am now, i guess i need to complete my casino assignment once and for all, and never ever touching it again.

i miss you slut, although nobody likes you and you got too much problems i still love you! and dont think i forgot about my bday present i tell you. and just to recall this picture was taken when we were waiting for alan over at his place. KAY U MAY DIE! always give me those damn fucked up voice when im busy den whne im free you eating with....... roll eyes! dont wanna know! den your fucked up msg will have HAHA? goodbye u may die.

i miss you, cause army sucks.

i miss you always, and i remember this picture! we had mac and cheese that day! im a good cook afterall. yah instant stuff.

this is just so damn cute! its a baseball cap ice cream cup! whatever bring me to florida? was it florida that i was reading about?

may i have waffles this weekend?
and salmon sashimi?
or kushinbo?
fucking hungry!

anyway why the pictures for previous entry look weird and all over the place its cause my STUPID --- friend did her entry on my blog and change my stupid picture settings! eh bitch you better watch out.

and lastly no more cough and flu?

i know i'm suppose to be doing my very fuck-ed up assignment but i've come to a conclusion that my body needs rest! YEAH BABY REST! i'm ill once again, ok what's new right? almost sound like " i'm going for dinner" thats how often i get sick. and why do i alwasy act super hardworking, turn off my tv (so i will do my work?) but im here blogging la.

anastasia crack me up today, i was playing mole a word in class, she was peeping and she goes " try fuck la try! your favourite word!" wtf i super keep my image in school already man! must be michelle! i see her in school i confirm lose control and start scolding her.

anyway to WEEKS BACK! my birthday, yesh i will just thank a few? firstly, nor for being such a mother to me, its a always thing? though im just a few months younger den her, she just feel WAY older la! hiya you guys wont understand! she got my the cake and all. super thank you!. ry for being my driver =) super happy! and everyone for coming! PRIS you no important la this year! disappointment. haha!BUT you're alwlays there. this bday pretty quiet, but i got my bb =)) and a chanel bag so nothing more to ask. fucking birken no stock -_-" stupid c brough me to pasta inc. everyone should try, but i really don't know what's good pasta, im obsessed with cream pasta so everything is nice to me! any pasta! JUST pasta mania! stupid cheapskate disgusting pasta. wait its not even cheap now!.

ok im not bored anymore. so byebye.

and ommgg! i found a picture i took that i completely look like my bro! EEWWW

account's paper part 1 down, and its really a humongous relief. but how i felt after flipping thru my papers was just disappointment. how can the test question be EXACT as revision paper?, how can theory question paper be EXACT as revision paper?. i'm so doubting school, it just shows why SIM is SIM, why private degree that sounds weird is private degree. comon. i have nothing more to say.
i admit casino's assignment is MADNESS! i'm no where near completing it but if everyone gets distinction or higher distinction, den definitely there's a problem.

away from school work now, i'm watching the hill and KYQ was right! kristen IS a bitch. and YEAEEYYY KYQ is coming back 29th =))))

butter fact last night was idk? hahha! photos up soon! hopefully if i have the time!

guess it's just a forever impression that would follow me for life, as much as i hate it, i'll continue to be the bad person (roll eyes), you people can go imgine whatever you want to (i'm not giving you people names already, ran out of it). nor wonder some people just dont shut up? cuase keeping quiet will cause you to be, wait, the loser?, yah that's right more like loser. great i'm the biggest loser!

watch your back.

me against time, no. it's me against sleep.
so many things left undone, almost there. yeap, almost dead.

no time to even update on my birthday =(

HI HI HI HI I KNOW WE MISS EACH OTHER SO THIS IS FOR YOU. GUESS WHERE WE TOOK THIS!

P.s I doubt you'd be able to guess. But I think you might then again. AND I know what your reason would be if you guessed it correctly!

Love, YOUR BESTEST BITCH EVER

one should never leave jocelyn waiting
one should never make jocelyn wait with them.

fucking mingle in town and spend money only.

fuck i hate my stupid school assignments.
FUCKED UP

OKAY I WAS SUPPOSE TO SLEEP! finally as i post the precious one. this stupid bitch of mine super cute ah.
Joyce, have you thought about it? I'm thinking how we first knew each other when I was only what, 13 and you 14? I remember you only in a group of friends. With claire and the rest. We both had so much quarrels last time i fucking swear I know I couldn't stand you 'cause you kept bullying me non-stop in school. Everytime you and the rest would all be against me. And then, I don't remember how we started getting close. You became the individual close friend to me apart from the rest. But then we had THE major quarrel I remember us having 2 years ago, when I chose my boyfriend over my (girl)friends. I completely lost you and it didn't bothered much to me honestly until He broke up with me and I was all alone.

I remember having to restart anew with nobody, no friends, no you.

You're the closest human being friend alive to me, almost like family. Someone who knows EVERY SINGLE THING about me. And I swear you're the only one who's seen my ugliest and unhappiest. The times when we'd just do nothing but lie on your bed eat mee goreng out of tupperware, when I have to even help you call your dental, pretending to be you and changing appointment, when we came up with using both our ipods to play the same song, I'd have one of your ear piece in my ear, and one of mine in yours and we'd press play together to make it play at the same time (seriously, who does that except us?) and then we'd get weird stares from people on the bus hahaha. We got our first tattoos together, dared each other to cut our hair fucking short (and then regret together after) hahaha all that shit, all because of you and with you!

And how I know exactly what you mean even without you having to say it out. Just by looking at your face, your expression or the way you say something and you don't want anyone else to know but me. I don't even have to see you to know what you're trying to tell me. Over the phone I also know! I think it's safe to say I know you inside out, like the back of my palms. I know the way you think, the things you like and what you actually mean when you say something that seems like the opposite. Please, half my photos on facebook has you in it.

You're the girl who's so close to me that even my dad lends you the car without hesitation every single time. And how every time when we're not with each other at clubs, everyone would go the usual "so where's Jocelyn?" or they'd go "where's Pris?" to you.

YOU'RE LIKE MY YIN AND I'M YOUR YANG OR SOME SHIT ALONG THAT LINE.

So this is the what, many-eth birthday we've celebrated together? And I promise you this is the few of the many more to come. I'll be there at your wedding, and you at mine. We'll grow up and old together and even when we're married with kids, we'd be at town pushing prams and shopping together. I'll watch your kids grow up and you watch mine. Forever and ever and ever, if it's within my means.And like....

Your face like that, how to not love you?! BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA BYE!P.s You know how fucking long it took me to do that collage or not! Better right-click save!

eh stupid bitch i still want my present i tell you! you are right about knowing me esp when i do this over the phone " HUH?" somewhere there ah! you just know i wasnt convinent to have out fucked up conversation. ok i wanna carry on BUT I SHOULD SLEEP SEE YOU LAH BITCH!.

lack of sleep lack of sleep lack of sleep.

gonna get some nice nap after this, no work today! SHOIK!

i caught a play, probably the only play i've ever watched. goh seng liang was super cute with his green bandanna around his head. i thought i wasnt allowed to take any shoots since no one did! anyhows, after his play random people would just say to him stuff like "you were impressive". totally don't get anything about plays, what's impressive, what's not. i think clubbing more impressive. at least i do remember he was brick man? always mingling with bricks.

tell me the rabbit in the pocket is cute.

super love.
super happy.

i just love looking at the fake "shawn" it just reminds me of you. ok it's you. no. nvm.

goodnight. bb soon. thursday soon. birthday soon.

i got new wishlist new wishlist!!
i want a bvlgari rose perfume!

everyone's asking for a wishlist, first ever wishlist btw.

WALLET! yes i need my mbmj wallet, after my ugly gucci got lost i've been longing for my mbmj wallet!
MOISTURIZER for my face! i never used one before cause i never believe in one! but i think i need something to put before make up! good one.
BIRKENSTOCK! i want the 1 with 2 black strip across! pretty sweet.

the rest of my list are dream on list. HAHAHA
tv? camera? chanel?

thats all.

no urban today, wanted shopping way too much. dropped my blades ( fucking burden) and qian's place to change cause we were suppose to work at attica tonight. fake me to spending money please! i thought i would have extra income!
anyhows, caught "sister's keeper" it isnt such a disappointment afterall, not bad boy cry to this moive toooooo!! but ending totally unexpected? the book is totally the other way please! how can the book be this ending but movie another ending! THATS WHY NEVER READ A BOOK WHEN THE MOVIE IS COMING OUT! but still......i like reading sad shit.

birthday preparing not done =( i bought pretty balloons!

can't believe how staying up till 3am could actually heal me.
i had mega flu for 3 days, got pissed at finance teacher cause he was super long-winded.

oh well, i decided to skip classes today, totally in the mood to shop =)) and i hate bringing blades to class, gonna urban today ard town area. goona kikki-ed everything by 31th, ok i needa go.

stupid priscilla, had damn many thing to blog, bloody slut keep talking to me over the phone. bye

yes i shouldn't be blogging i should be dead asleep.

as usual i'm sick, when will it EVER END!

i'm just hoping there would be someone out there reminding me to eat proper meals everyday. whatever fuck it.